this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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