So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize