White coat. Heels.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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