belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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