So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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