You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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