Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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