It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
