Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
