bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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