IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
