Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize