if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Ladies don't puke and tell
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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