I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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