we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize