i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
