I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize