ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
