The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
