Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Randomize
