Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Randomize
