So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
