did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Holy shit dude........stairs
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
