Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I know her cup size but not her name....
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