whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
