I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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