just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
