Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize