I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize