I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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