This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
