Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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