The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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