Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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