Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
