Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
