Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
why is half of my head shaved?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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