Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I think I am morally bankrupt
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
