Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize