Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
