I want to stick my p in your. b.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
