Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize
