That's intense
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Randomize
