in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
