I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
