I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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