I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I said "one day" and that day is not today
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
