like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Can I color on your dick again?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize