i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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