More tranny stories later!
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
