How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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