you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
